This is a parody about some of our histories great inventors. There is no chronological order or time line, we have to imagine that they all lived on the same day and were even in the same room when Henry Ford made his announcement.

Henry Ford.  1863-1947

 Who invented what ? the answers rest in the inventors comments !

Please note for historical accuracy that these quotes have been made up by me for this page to exist. However the inventors, their names and what they invented is accurate and true.

Henry Ford : Ladies and Gentlemen, I am pleased...no...I am delighted to announce my invention of the worlds first mass produced car...

...The Model T.     Indeed  I am set to make a million of them in the first year.

And you can have it in any color you like.....as long as its black !  "

John W Lambert: HEY Ford ! I  invented the first gasoline powered car in the States, not you ! So why are you getting all the credit huh  

Ransome Eli Olds:  Hey, I'm getting niffed by all of this too Ford ! why, I invented the first commercially successful  production car in the States 'The Oldsmobile' in 1901' my assembly line was crude, but it worked. So how come you get all the jollies ? 

Henry Ford:  Well my dear sir's, Its all down to my focused production and marketing strategy this along with an acute sense of business acumen can only indicate that knocking out only one car or so or producing them too slowly and slapping a huge price tag on it simply isn't the way to do it.

The Wright Brothers: That idea will never take off ! 

Thomas Alva Edison: You might need to see where you are going at night, want some proper lights on it ? and not those awful calcium carbide lamps either !

Henry Ford:  Another bright idea  

John Dunlop to Charles Goodyear: Those solid tires look a bit rubbish don't they Charles ?  

 Yes John, they do...... Hey Henry ! would you like some quality pneumatic ones on it ? 

Nicolaus August Otto: A four stroke engine is fitted I trust, Henry ? 

Henry Ford: Well what do you think I have installed in my cars for a power plant.....a lawn mower engine ! 

Gottlieb Daimler: " I'm so Glad some-one mentioned engines, because I was  going to inquire if you were entirely happy with the engine in your car Ford ? 

Rudolf Diesel: How about a more stalwart design !

Michael Faraday: Or maybe an electric one !, that might be better. I'll have a tinker and see what I can do.

Henry Ford: Electric engines, Diesel engines, Daimler engines.....what's all this talk ? you were invited here for the presentation NOT to market your hopeless ideas. Gentlemen....please be quiet or I will have to have you removed from this venue  

Sir Frederick Henry Rolls and Hon Charles Stewart Royce : Hmmm, We could make a better job than that ! , why the whole design needs to be completely overhauled, re-modified, reinforced, upgraded, strengthened, refurnished, refurbished and well.....rebuilt !  

Charles Stewart Royce : "Well I'll tell you what Rolls, we'll build our own motor cars from scratch.     

Charles Babbage: bet I could work out how fast that thing can go on my computing differential engine, and that's not an engine for car either Mr Ford ! 

Albert Einstein: That's easy Mr. Babbage, E=MC^2. Energy equals mass x velocity squared...and there you have it

General Motors Inc  ( invented the hydra-matic auto gearbox) :

Don't you think that 2 forward and 1 reverse manual gears is a bit naff there Mr. Ford ?  

Henry Ford: " Why, not at all, its transportation for the masses  and the gears that are equipped on this car will suffice. "

Guglielemo Marconi and Heinrich Hertz : Hey that's a great car Mr. Ford, but wouldn't you like some in car entertainment.....a radio perhaps ? 

Henry Ford: Sounds good to me gentlemen, I need a device to advertise my car, can your radio do it ? 

Samuel Morse:  I will send a message to everyone about your new car Mr. Ford. Don't worry.

Henry Ford: Why thank you Sam, will they understand it all though ?  

Levi Strauss: As the occupants of your car are in the open air, they may need suitable hard wearing attire whilst driving in your car Mr. Ford. 

Charles Mackintosh:  No, no, no, Strauss they will need to be waterproof ! 

Henry Ford:  Don't get perplexed gentlemen, I've thought of everything. There is a canopy that can be manually extended that will give to cover the occupants in rainy weather. 

George Eastman:  I will get a good photo of that car with the canopy up for you Mr. Ford ! 

Henry Ford:  In color too perhaps.

Edwin Hubert Land: It will need to be a Polaroid instant photo Mr. Eastman, people don't like waiting weeks and weeks for the developing process.

Mary Anderson: You mentioned rainy weather Mr. Ford ! you will need some windscreen wipers on that car.  

Henry Ford: That idea should wipe away a few problems ! 

Louis Braille:  I naturally presume the blind won't be able to operate this car but they might like to read about it !  

Henry Ford: I'm glad you have seen that aspect Mr. Braille ! 

Edith Flanigen: You'll need the best burning fuel to run that engine of yours Mr. Ford. I'll see If I can improve the petrol refining.

Henry Ford: Well I didn't intend to run her on old cooking oil !  

Edith Flanigen : Octane Mr. Ford, Octane !  

Anthony Van Leeuwenhoek: Under the microscope it all seems fine.

Warren Morrison: Hey ! How about a nice accurate quartz clock to go in the dashboard then Henry ?  

Henry Ford: At 60 miles an hour, all you can hear is the engine running ! 

Hiram Maxim:  er...if you DO need to put a machine gun on it...give me a shout...ok ! 

Henry Ford: Haha, No, that won't be necessary Hiram !  

Hiram Maxin: Well just in case I'll have Alexander Grahman Bell give you my number. 

Alfred Nobel :  If you get sick of this car and this whole production idea of yours Ford then allow me to blow it up for you! 

Henry Ford:  I suppose you think that statement is dynamite, you make sick by saying you could blow up my car !  

John Logie Baird:  If you do blow it up, I'll watch it on the Television.

Alexander Graham Bell: "Give me a ring  will you Baird and I'll come round to watch it too ! 

The Wright Brothers:  Well, we will watch it all from the air. 

Sir Frank Whittle:  Wilbur !, Orville !, Can I have a word with you chaps a bit later ? 

Galileo Galilei:  I'll watch from a safe distance.  

Isaac Newton:  It will need to be reflective for best results though Galileo ! 

Alexander Flemming: Did someone say they were sick ? Was it you Henry ? Car-sickness was it ? well I have the very best thing for sickness......... 

Florence Nightingale: Need any help there ? 

Madam Curie: No.....I think He's got it sorted !  

 George Stevenson: Phew !........ Just got here, Sorry I'm late, I missed the train......hello.....anyone.....er...